WHAT I GRIEVE FOR

For all the moments lost when
I tried to connect to you--
You didn't want to do it,
You had better things to do.

For all the times you embarrassed
And humiliated me.
All the hateful things you
Said left scars inside of me.

For all the times you blamed
Me for things I didn't do,
And all the times you said things and
Called us liars--it was us, never you.

For all the things fathers and
Daughters usually do--I grieve
For never having that unless
There were others you wanted to deceive.

For all the times you said I was stupid
And wouldn't amount to anything--
That being said to you all the time,
Crushes your self-esteem.

I'm trying to forgive you--
God and I are working on that.
But the scars you left on my heart
Will take years to heal from the past.

It's not my place to judge you--
That is God's job to do.  You've
Been gone 15 years--hopefully
Now you understand why I grieve.